Boas, bikinis, and blue lips

This story was printed January 2, 2009

BY BO PETERSEN
At English Bay in Canada, maybe the birthplace of the Polar Bear Plunge, the air on New Year's Day was freezing and sleeting, and the water was nearly ice.

At Sullivan's Island, it only felt like it.

On one of the coldest days in the 15 years of this Lowcountry swim, one of its biggest mobs ever screamed into the surf in bathrobes, boas, bikinis and assorted regalia.

This is the story that made me start this blog. Bo Peterson's lack of caring seeps through the pores of this story. Click on the headline to read the whole thing. Its such a beautiful disaster. Though the headline itself is not without merit. I mean, does "Boas, Bikinis and Blue Lips" create the scene of a polar bear swim? Not really. So, I'm already out of place when the story begins, but the lede should change that. But again, it doesn't. Apparently, Sullivan's Island is not setting enough and I am in Canada the day after New Years. Ummm...ok. But at least I know it was freezing or sleeting and the water was icy. Nope, apparently it just felt like it? When does 40 degree weather fell like sleeting? Regardless, it was one of the coldest days of the Lowcountry swim, though there was never a mention of just how cold. Also, "one of its biggest mobs ever screamed in to the surf." How big is a mob? Can we at least get an estimate? Was it 100 people? Maybe 1000? Give me some idea, Bo. Also, the "screamed into the surf" starts our wonderful transition into alliteration. The rest of the sentence is all alliteration. Especially after our wonderful headline, we should end on a bang, right? Ummm...no. Bo can't even finish us off. He gives us the "bathrobes, boas, bikinis and assorted regalia." Assorted regalia? Where the hell did the monarchy come from? Regalia? Seriously? Ok... I need to stop now. I can go on forever. Read the story for more.