Mourning, tears mix with hope amid ashes

BY ALLYSON BIRD

NORTH MYRTLE BEACH — A young mother wearing yellow rubber gloves sobbed as she climbed up onto the charred pile that had been her family's home.

The perfectly intact toy dump truck amazed Melissa Mattson almost as much as her Barefoot Resort neighborhood at large — how a fire could be so discriminating, picking her home over her neighbor's, her kitchen over a child's toy.



I give kudos to Allyson for trying to make this an Extreme Makeover: Home Edition sob story. In the second paragraph, Ty Pennington comes in, hugs the mom and sends her to lovely Myrtle Beach for the week while they build her a new home.

Also, according to Allyson, fire is discriminating and rather bigoted. Nature is such a bitch.

Hundreds continue containment

BY ROBERT BEHRE

NORTH MYRTLE BEACH — The battle against South Carolina's largest forest fire in 30 years continued Saturday as more than 100 firefighters in helicopters, bulldozers and firetrucks struggled to maintain the upper hand.

In 50 years, knowing South Carolina, we will blame the North and have reenactments of this epic battle with people dressed like they did in the 2000's.

Gang-related activity raises concerns

BY GLENN SMITH

WALTERBORO — The gang member leaned into the crowded nightclub and beckoned to Donald Green to join him outside. The gang member wasn't there to talk, debate or ponder what would come next. Green barely had time to taste the night air before the first bullet slammed into his body.

If I have to read a led two or three times in order to understand it, its not a good lede. Like this one for example. I give it kudos for the Shakespeare-like intro where there is a death or a fight right away, but still this headline is a mess. Our antagonist is nameless, which probably means he wasn't caught. So automatically we have a character to hate whom we have no idea who he is, but we do question if he talks at all. Then our protagonist dies within the first paragraph. The sad thing is we never got to attach ourselves to this character. There wasn't any development, other than that he likes tasting night air. This is actually becoming a Hitchcock movie. This is an obvious attempt from Gary to write his screenplay while writing his story. This kind of killing two birds with one stone is becoming popular.


Also, the headline is a little too easy. Has gang related activity ever been pushed under the rug? Or has anyone ever uttered, "Oh thugs will be thugs." Let's try again Gary.

Truxtun ready for any mission

BY SCHUYLER KROPF

The guided-missile destroyer Truxtun was commissioned into the U.S. Navy under a beaming blue sky Saturday, welcomed in as the most advanced warship in the world today.

Its funny. I am a stay-at-home dad and in Charleston I have come across the weirdest names ever for kids. I have met a Jessen, a Cooper, and, my personal favorite, a Seabrook. I also went to high school who named her kid Furman. These names typically come from the upper middle class and of the WASP persuasion. Sadly, I think some WASP had the naming right to this one. Truxtun? Really?

Also, thank you Schuyler for letting us know the weather forecast in your lede and that it was a "beaming blue sky Saturday." Its rather appropriate there. Thanks.

Scarlett, Rhett and Tallulah

BY BRIAN HICKS

When she was born, her family still had to saddle up the horses to get into town.

Air conditioning and television were ideas too fanciful to even consider, and the only folks guaranteed the right to vote were white men with some schooling. Mark Twain was still walking the Earth, but he didn't feel real good.


Bryan Hicks is the new Willard Scott. Let me save you the time to link on this as this is about a 100 year old lady named Tallulah (I accept your gratitude). This is another one of those "Hey, let's laugh at old people and what they didn't have." articles. Let's jump 100 years into the future and see how one would write an article about today, shall we?

When she was born, her family still had to climb into these big things called Hummers which used gasoline.

Cold fusion and memory receptors were ideas too fanciful to even consider, and the only folks guaranteed a right to decide an election were people from Ohio and Florida. Stephen Hawking was still rolling the Earth, but he didn't feel real good.

See. Rather easy. And unless Mark Twain used the quote didn't feel real good, we are in the realm of some really bad grammar.

'War zone' for poor Latinos?

BY JILL COLEY

Poor Latinos described life in the South as living in a "war zone" in a report released Tuesday by the Southern Poverty Law Center.

I'm all a fan for instant gratification. It makes life easier on me and those around me. So, today's best example of instant gratification comes from Jill Coley. Ask a random question in the headline, get a response in the lede. That's it. I'm done. No need to read the rest of the story. Though there would have been a much easier way to write this then to write the headline again. For example:

'War Zone' for poor Latinos?

BY JILL COLEY

Yes.

11-year-old girl propositioned

BY NADINE PARKS

GOOSE CREEK — A convicted killer apparently found an 11-year-old Summerville girl's cell phone number on her MySpace page, sent her nude photos and tried to convince her to meet him for sex, authorities said.




Ewwwww. People are still on Myspace?

I'm kidding. Sort of. Kudos, Nadine for a very effective lede that made my cereal say "Ick."

Council passes two faith-based resolutions

BY BO PETERSEN

ST. GEORGE — Two godly resolutions were passed by Dorchester County Council on Monday, in short order. What's going on? Politics, two government observers say.

Two things:

1. Godly resolutions? Is St. George rewriting the 10 Commandments? Bo is thrusting those adjectives early upon us today. Which one might ask, "Is godly an adjective? I mean it has the -ly at the end." No this time godly is an adjective. Bo grammatically puts us into the story automatically, not only with godly but a question in the lede. Usually I have to ask the question. This time he reminds me of what I am asking way before I even need to ask it and then answers it. Nevermind that we don't need to do this. Bo does it anyway. He's a loner, Dottie. A rebel. This guy is my new hero.

2. Only in the South. Ok, maybe also Utah.

Spat over Kiawah spit

BY TONY BARTELME

For years, Sidi Limehouse put up hand-painted signs near Rosebank Farms on Johns Island touting everything from tomatoes to Easter egg hunts. When the area's real estate sales wilted, he had one made saying: "Wanted: real estate agents to pick beans! See Sidi."

Then last month, he put up another: "Develop Cap'n Sam's Spit? No way." The sign included a phone number for Friends of the Kiawah River, a group he founded to oppose the development of Kiawah's southern tip.

Ok. This has left me for a loss. I...uh...um...I have no idea what the hell is going on here. I have read this over and over and it is still lost on me. Now granted, the guy makes signs. I get that. But to develop that so early in a lede without explanation is ridiculous. The story tells the rest of the tale (as it should) but the lede can leave one confused and irritable (as I am).

Extra giggle points for Cap'n Sam's Spit. Swallow already taken?

First death penalty case for Charleston County in 5 years

BY ROBERT BEHRE

Charleston County's first death penalty trial in more than five years will begin today, and William Oliver Dickerson will find out whether he will meet the same fate as his father, who was convicted of murder and died in prison.


Awww. Like father, like son. Now we can officially kickoff our Monday with that pesky nature vs. nurture debate.

On a side note: I have always wanted to be called in for jury duty. How has this not happened yet?

Lisicki, 19, captures her first WTA title

BY JEFF HARTSELL
Sabine Lisicki blasted a 125 mph serve on the way to the Family Circle Cup title Sunday on Daniel Island.

The career of the 19-year-old German is taking off at similar speed after a 6-2, 6-4 victory over fellow teenager Caroline Wozniacki in the finals of the $1 million Family Circle Cup tennis tournament.



The Family Circle Cup has been here for 6 or 7 years now and it has still not taken off the way they thought it would've. How else do you explain the Lisicki-Wozniacki battle of the ages we were given on Tuesday? Not only that but a straight set victory. Excuse me while my bowl of cereal yawns.

Also, note to all eligible perverts out there: 19 year old German tennis players move at the speed of 125 MPH or "similar speeds." This can help you when try to stalk and pawn over Ms. Lisicki or her "fellow teenager" Caroline Wozniack. Fellow teenager? Really?

Local history lives: Battle of Charleston

BY BRIAN HICKS

For a moment, you can step back in time 150 years.

You can watch a blacksmith forge lantern hangers, listen to a nurse recount the horrors of war in a hospital tent, see a woman go through the slow, methodical process of making paraffin wax candle

That's right. You can watch paint dry. Wouldn't it be appropriate to sell your story then to tell right away how bland and boring the event your covering is? I didn't think so.

Upcoming cases

Five upcoming local death penalty cases:


This is all I got on a Sunday morning email. Nothing about the Family Circle Cup. Nothing about Kulture Klash 4. Nothing about Earth Day activities. However, this is one story I might have actually wanted to click on. Simplicity. Simplicity.

Gadgets give police crime-fighting edge

BY GLENN SMITH

For years, Charleston police officers depended on whatever random information crackled over their radios to alert them to the people and perils they might encounter when rolling to a call.

The Post and Courier is obviously a fan of description. Can it just be information? Nope. It must be random information. Does that random information transmit through radio devices? Nope. They crackle. Does the crackling random information describe the details of a situation? Nope. They alert them to the people and perils they might encounter. The tipping point for me though is the rolling to the call. Maybe just a tiny bit of slang. But usually cars arrive at a scene. Cars don't roll to a call.

Also, how can you have gadgets in the headline and not throw out a James Bond reference or Inspector Gadget reference since it is a soft lede? I mean, really?

Under the bridge downtown ... (Preview Email)

By Vikki Matsis (Special to The Post and Courier)

Everyone's got something they're recovering from: a hangover, a heartbreak or the traffic from tourists on Market Street.

I can throw some love to when its merited. Vikki has used a catchy song lyric from Red Hot Chili Peppers "Under the Bridge" (a song that came out 17 years ago btw) and made an appropriate reference to a restaurant that is ...wait for it... under a bridge somewhere downtown. Nicely done. Its actually quite sad though that Vikki is only free-lancing. Her wit could easily shake things up a bit.

Film based on Nicholas Sparks book drawing attention in Charleston

BY BILL THOMPSON

After having transformed the second-floor lobby of the Galliard Municipal Auditorium into an airport security checkpoint complete with "gates," director Lasse Hallström and his "Dear John" crew spent Thursday shooting a series of exterior and interior shots on King Street.


Truthfully, I haven't even read the lede. I don't plan on it either. The funny thing about this is that I got this in my Post and Courier Preview email. Every Thursday, the send out an email 'previewing' (ah, catchy isn't it) the culture around Charleston. I get some articles on music, art, movies and a decent columnist. However, this one has been the only story under "Movie" since November 13, 2008. That's right. It has been 128 days or 18 weeks since they have changed it. I know things tend to move slower in South Carolina, but this might be a bit over the top. Here's hoping for 20 weeks. Only two more to go.

It's Mount 'Pleasant,' so keep it quiet

BY KEN BURGER

Barbara Benton read my column last week about how it's considered impolite to honk your car horn here in the Lowcountry. Two days later she found out it's also against the law.

Ken is an over all nice guy (the one chance I had to meet him) and a heck of a writer. However, he is spanning away from his usual sports columns and delivering a slice of life Americana style. It was a slow day via email so I'm improvising a bit, mainly because they did an overall decent job with the Tea Bag party headline (damn it). I do like how Ken quoted "Pleasant". Oh stop it. Don't roll your eyes. It's all I got. Columnists can get a break unless absurd. Though I never really care about old white ladies and their driving habits. But who else is going to read the Post and Courier. They have to cater to the old and wrinkly and use them when they have nothing to write about. I guess old people still serve a purpose. Don't you go dying on me Barbara.

Quick work kept suspect in U.S.

BY BO PETERSEN

Jose Perea was 10 miles from the Rio Grande. The man accused of killing Helen Lynn Hancock was about to vanish. All that stopped him were two "freaked out" roommates and police who worked against a ticking clock.

So, Bo delivers a powerful follow up on the whole dead hooker mugshot story from yesterday. Bo actually sets it up nicely. He's reeling me in with suspense and drama. And just when I'm about to click on the link, I get the "freaked out" part. Really? Freaked out? You had to quote that, Bo? Yesterday, you were the guy who made strangulation "grisly." Couldn't spew some adjectives this time? Damn. However, the only thing I could think of while reading this was the Jerry Maguire scene. "I'm going to do what everybody expects me to do and flip out, man!!!" Its not freak out, but its still close enough for a comparison.

Charleston area avoids label of car-theft mecca

BY SCHUYLER KROPF

South Carolina's numbers aren't great when it comes to stolen car rates. But at least the Charleston-North Charleston area is among the safest places to park your car when you are here.


Well, thank a third world deity. I would never know which direction to pray if Mecca was here in Charleston.

Though quick question. Would you still be comfortable parking your car in North Charleston? Me neither.

Carolina Lowcountry Preserve sanctuary tries to care for nearly 150 cats

This story was printed April 13, 2009

BY BO PETERSEN

RAVENEL—You'd have to see the "Doll House" to believe it. Shelves of puffy sleeping pads with red blankets and an elevated walkway running overhead at the door, bowls of wet and dry food, hatches where the occupants can pop outdoors, all in a spotless white cabin with skylights.

What's the "Doll House"? I googled it. I imdb'd it. There is not a reference to cats and "Doll House." Now there was a movie from 1973 based on the Henrik Ibsen play entitled "A Doll House." Whether there are cats or not, I know not. Thank you, Bo for putting a reference to something no one can find anything about.

Now regardless if the lede answers the 5W's or not (btw it doesn't), Bo can definitely spew some adjectives. After reading it, I'm still kind of confused as to what is going on. But I'm hoping (Dear lord baby Jesus please let this be correct), that Bo misspelled "poop." I really think he did.

If you're a procrastinator, tips can help you cope with this taxing deadline

BY WARREN WISE

With fewer than 48 hours to go, you've done everything you could to avoid crunching the numbers for your 2008 tax return.
Well, unless you are one of the 6 percent of South Carolinians expected to ask for an extension, you can forget about fishing or shopping or lying around dreading the inevitable. Your free time is up.


Here is a wonderful story (I'm assuming) on tips that will help ease your deadline woes. I'm sure clicking on the link will tell you five or maybe ten of them. However, the best tip is offered in the lede itself, which is "ask for an extension." Duh, dumbass. Now get back to shopping, fishing, lying around, etc.

Strangulation suspect captured

BY NADINE PARKS, BO PETERSEN
Jose Roman Cauih Perea woke to find the body of the prostitute he hired. That's what police think happened in a grisly strangulation Friday of a woman later found in the bushes by a Rantowles Creek boat landing near Ravenel.


Oh what a joyous day!!!! I wake up and check my email and I find this treasure staring me in the face. Not only do we get a mugshot of the suspect, we get a mugshot of the dead hooker too. WOO HOO!!! And not only do I get a dead hooker mugshot, I get a Bo Petersen lede. This is almost the equivalent of B.T.L.'s Perfect Storm.

Let's break this gem down:
"Jose Roman Cauih Perea woke to find the body of the prostitute he hired." Since when, Bo, do prostitutes stay the night? Also, do we need the entire name? Jose Perea would have sufficed unless we didn't want to confuse all the other Jose Perea's in the Charleston area.

"That's what police think happened in a grisly strangulation Friday of a woman later found in the bushes by a Rantowles Creek boat landing near Ravenel." The police think he had a sleepover? The police think Jose strangled her when she found her in his bed? I'm confused where Bo is taking me. However, to take us deeper into the scene, we are given the adjective "grisly." Because most stragulations are gentle, we needed to know that police think that this one is "grisly." Other things I think are grisly: Waffle House steak, Robert Duval, strangualtions. Got it. Also, I like the logic problem presented by Bo this morning. If you need me to break it down, here you go:

Jose finds hooker in bed
Hooker in bed was killed by strangulation
Hooker's body in bushes near a boat landing in Ravenel.
Jose left body there.

Did you get that? It's kind of early for logic problems, but its ok. I'm here to work it out for you.

Also, if you click on the link and follow the story there is this little gem: "Decrepit mobile homes line the dirt roads, and a flock of chickens and several feral cats roam freely among heaps of trash and tall weeds." Poetry. Sheer poetry.

Blaze claims fire official's home

BY DAVE MUNDAY

AWENDAW — For 13 years, Charleston County Volunteer Rescue Squad Deputy Chief Gary Durgin has put his life on the line saving other people's houses.

I'm glad to see they saved Gunner's Mate First Class Phillip Asshole for the second paragraph. Also, Mr. Durgin's business card must be HUGE.

On another note, shouldn't the lede typically tell you the 5 W's? Oddly, it is the headline that does it for us. The lede is just fodder with a 7 word title.

County goal of recycling 40% of waste will take effort, incentives, experts say

BY DIANE KNICH
Let's face it, sorting bottles, cans and newspapers is a little more work than throwing everything in the trash bin. You've also got to store it and get it out to the curb every other week on just the right day. Miss one and you spend the next two weeks balancing more bottles on the overflowing heap in the blue plastic tubs.




Let's face it. When writing a front page story about a topical issue that can impact our lives and ask its fellow readers for sacrifices, a hard news lede is typically what is needed. Did we get it? Um...no. What do we get instead? The biggest no-no of journalism, an article written in the second-person. Not only is this laziness from the author, but also from the editor. Since this is the first story of the daily email, I'm assuming this story is also on the front page. Ouch. But take a look at the lede itself regardless of the faux pas. From the headline, the county government wants to make a strong goal to help recycle. Does this resonate from the lede itself? Not really. The lede states how recycling is annoying. I'm hoping the rest of the story explains how recycling should be a conscious effort. I just hope Diane didn't recycle her writing for the mass media books.

Gunfire leaves 1 dead

This article appeared April 10, 2009.

BY ANDY PARAS
A man lies dead in front of an abandoned house. A trail of blood dots the sidewalk and grass. A neighbor's Pontiac Bonneville is splattered with blood and broken glass, a bullet hole in its rear panel.


This is clearly the case of Andy's feeble attempt to write his screenplay and a news story at the same time. His journalistic integrity made him state it was a Pontiac Bonneville, though he really wanted to put it was a Lamborghini. It will be changed in the editing process.

Also, the headline might need some tweaking. We don't really need "1" do we? "Man" or even "North Charleston man" should suffice.

Service animal helps autistic kid

BY JILL COLEY
"Dog for a walk" is Smith Pruitt's mantra. The autistic 11-year-old boy points to Aubrey, a yellow Labrador retriever, as he repeats faster, "Dog for a walk."


Kudos and bonus points for using "mantra" in the lede. However, the author loses them as she forgot to capitalize "retriever." No points this round.

Everything is just right for first Farmers Market of the year

BY TONY BARTELME
By mid-morning Saturday, it was as thick as a beehive in the downtown Farmers Market, and Karen Kennerty told someone on the phone that she was running out of honey.










Sometimes, the author can write such amazing things that I don't need to comment. Regardless of how stunned my face was this morning when reading this, I can still throw one or two comments. For starters, how thick is a beehive? Are the walls thick or the amount of bees? Or is this simply cute southern speak to remind us that we live in a simple spoken area that uses cute wisps so as to avoid real description? Secondly, and this just might be nit-picking, is Karen on the phone or is she talking to someone next to her that is on the phone? Details, details, details.

Boas, bikinis, and blue lips

This story was printed January 2, 2009

BY BO PETERSEN
At English Bay in Canada, maybe the birthplace of the Polar Bear Plunge, the air on New Year's Day was freezing and sleeting, and the water was nearly ice.

At Sullivan's Island, it only felt like it.

On one of the coldest days in the 15 years of this Lowcountry swim, one of its biggest mobs ever screamed into the surf in bathrobes, boas, bikinis and assorted regalia.

This is the story that made me start this blog. Bo Peterson's lack of caring seeps through the pores of this story. Click on the headline to read the whole thing. Its such a beautiful disaster. Though the headline itself is not without merit. I mean, does "Boas, Bikinis and Blue Lips" create the scene of a polar bear swim? Not really. So, I'm already out of place when the story begins, but the lede should change that. But again, it doesn't. Apparently, Sullivan's Island is not setting enough and I am in Canada the day after New Years. Ummm...ok. But at least I know it was freezing or sleeting and the water was icy. Nope, apparently it just felt like it? When does 40 degree weather fell like sleeting? Regardless, it was one of the coldest days of the Lowcountry swim, though there was never a mention of just how cold. Also, "one of its biggest mobs ever screamed in to the surf." How big is a mob? Can we at least get an estimate? Was it 100 people? Maybe 1000? Give me some idea, Bo. Also, the "screamed into the surf" starts our wonderful transition into alliteration. The rest of the sentence is all alliteration. Especially after our wonderful headline, we should end on a bang, right? Ummm...no. Bo can't even finish us off. He gives us the "bathrobes, boas, bikinis and assorted regalia." Assorted regalia? Where the hell did the monarchy come from? Regalia? Seriously? Ok... I need to stop now. I can go on forever. Read the story for more.

Plane lands on beach

BY PRENTISS FINDLAY
ISLE OF PALMS — Beachgoers and residents got a surprise Friday when a small plane made an emergency landing on the beach at 32nd Avenue.

"I look out there, and a plane is in front of my house," said Robert Chesnut. "It's pretty wild. We just couldn't believe it."

I just imagine the nice southern, trailer-park accent. Thank some third-world deity the byline said Isle of Palms to keep me in context.